Unsettled

I brought out the old manual typewriter this morning.  I typed a letter to B on it just as I did many times several years ago.  I typed slowly so as not to make any typos, but still a few crept in without my knowing until I had finished.

B’s been working in Europe again these past few weeks.  She sends me wonderful postcards from the cities where she stays.  The postcards make me want to a buy a plane ticket and show up on her doorstep.  However, our meeting this year will be in New York City where rumor has it they don’t say their prayers.  She’ll be with her daughter and her daughter’s fiance, who I am told is a fine man headed for a career in law enforcement.  I suspect her daughter and I will be the ones who stay out past curfew sampling the saloons.  I think it will be the first time I’ve seen her since the weekend I taught her to drive.  She turned corners without slowing down and I prayed along the ride that parked cars would not sit nearby.

B leaves Antwerp this weekend for two weeks of work in Costa Rica.  B and I vacationed in Costa Rica once.  She had just come off major surgery for a tumor.  Her doctors had not yet discovered that during her post surgery nuking they had killed her thyroid gland.  She was tired and irritable the whole time in Costa Rica.  I suspect that was the beginning of the time when she had met some other guy too.  She’d never admit it, but I’m sure she’d rather have been with him.

Oh well, she wants to be with me now.  Quite frankly, I’d move to where she lives, but she is always undecided where she wants to live.  The thought of buying a place, getting settled, then selling a year later because she no longer lives there does not appeal to me.

The sun’s arched high into the sky.  I knew it as a puppy this morning shedding its light across the horizon at five.  Soon, the dawn will sleep past five each morning and I’ll be alone on State Street at that hour.  Things fade, then return in cycles I won’t outlive.  Things tend to even out.

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Published in: on July 17, 2009 at 10:02 am  Leave a Comment  

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